Trinity Performance Solutions

lorik2015

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Don’t Get Your Tinsel in a Tangle

Christmas CardTis the season to be …..stressed? We are entering that time of year where schedules are busier, expectations are higher and deadlines are looming. Suddenly, we notice that our patience is running thin, energy is low, our digestive system is off and sleep has become that long lost friend. Our stress is at an all time high.

Stress is defined as a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or very demanding circumstances. As leaders, we need to remember that people are watching our actions far more than they are listening to our words. If our actions are an indication that we are running at full throttle and slowly breaking down; this is exactly what those around us are going to mimic. So what happens when your entire workforce is sick and broken down? Exactly!

So with all we have going on during this holiday, how do we add the jolly back into the season and encourage those around us? Here are my top 10 de-stressors:

  1. Exercise – yep, you knew I was going to say that! I know, you don’t have time. Trust me, you don’t have the option to NOT have time. Exercise in almost any form can act as a stress reliever. Being active can boost your positive endorphins and distract you from daily worries.
  2. Say No, Prioritize –Remember, you don’t have to do it all. Prioritize what must be done and then only accept invitations that bring you joy. Need a dish? Grab something from the bakery if the idea of cooking stresses you out! Keep in mind that saying yes is still saying no to something else. So make sure your yeses count and use that all powerful word: NO!
  3. Sleep – Sleep is essential for a person’s health and well-being. Getting enough quality sleep at the right times can help protect your mental health, physical health, quality of life and safety. The National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute recommend seven to eight hours for healthy adults.   A good night’s sleep makes you able to tackle the stress more easily. When you are tired, you are less patient and more easily agitated which can increase stress.
  4. Appreciate What You Have – Many of us live in a perpetual state of wanting more and we spend our time chasing those material possessions, but once we have them how long do they make us happy? A day, a week, a month? Then we move on to the next coveted item. If you’re like most, either your house is filled to capacity with junk you don’t use or you’re making weekly trips to the thrift store to discard those once prized items.   Learn to become grateful with all that you currently have, give more, and spend time with someone who doesn’t have what you have!
  5. Delegate – Lots of things need to be done during the holidays but that doesn’t mean you have to do it all! Hosting a party? It’s ok to ask people to bring their favorite dish.   Delegate chores to other members of your household or break down and hire a housekeeper.  Get the kids involved with cooking and gift wrapping! Remember, there are plenty of people who are willing to take responsibility and help out. While they might not do it the way you would want it doesn’t mean that their way isn’t just as good or better.
  6. Disconnect – Set aside time to disconnect from the frantic 24-hour, always on call demands of modern technology. Turn off your smart phone, tablet and laptop. Click off the TV and shelve your iPad. To successfully sever the tech umbilical cord, you may have to put your favorite electronic devices in another room where you won’t be tempted to check for missed messages. Focus on the natural world around you. Go for a long walk, watch a sunset or play a game with your children. Let the world flow around you and wash away your cares.
  7. Quite Time – Get up a few minutes early in the morning or retreat a few minutes early before bed and spend some time alone. Find a place where there are no distractions and you can be silent. Read motivational or spiritual passages, close your eyes and clear your mind. Pray or breathe or stretch. Just be.
  8. Breathe – Breathing exercises can help you reduce tension and relieve stress due to an extra boost of oxygen. What’s more, breathing exercises have been proven in clinical research to aid some of the systems that are harmed by stress!
  9. Laugh – According to Mayo Clinic, a good laugh has great short-term effects. When you start to laugh it doesn’t just lighten your load mentally, it actually induces physical changes in your body like stimulating organs, activating and relieving your stress response and soothing tension. So watch a funny movie, go to see a great comedian, watch some of the hilarious short clips on YouTube, or spend some time with great friends who always make you laugh.
  10. Support System – Part of life is experiencing it’s ups and downs and the holidays are no exception. We need people in our life who understand us and can be depended upon during tough times. Research has proven that having a support system has many positive benefits such as higher levels of well-being, better coping skills and a longer, healthier life. Studies have also shown that social support systems reduce depression and anxiety. So make a list of those people in your life that add value and reach out to them this holiday season.
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A Time to Be Thankful

IMG_0765As Thanksgiving comes to a close, many of us in the United States stop to think about the many things we are thankful for: family, health, life, friends. It’s this time when we slow down, just slightly, to enjoy and reflect. But why only this week? Why not everyday?

Recently scientists have begun to chart a course of research aimed at understanding gratitude and the circumstances in which it flourishes or diminishes. They’re finding that people who practice gratitude consistently report a host of benefits:

  • stronger immune system
  • higher levels of positive emotions
  • more joy, optimism & happiness
  • acting with more generosity & compassion
  • feeling less lonely & isolated

When you write about a happy event, your brain relives that good feeling. And when you focus repeatedly on something that feels good, your brain rewires itself to do that more effortlessly in the future. By practicing awareness of the positive things in life, we fight off the brain’s natural tendency to scan for and spot the negatives.

A while back, I was given Ann Voskamp’s book “One Thousand Gifts.” After reading, I was challenged to write 1,000 things that I am grateful for. Everyday I add to my list. It’s not complete yet, but it challenges me to reflect everyday on even the smallest things I am thankful for: beautiful fallen leaves in the Fall, a hot cup of coffee, little hands that want to hold mine, Friday night football, breath.  I have noticed that when I take time to be thankful, the problems I dwell on don’t seem to be so significant. I don’t need to “worry so much about tomorrow for tomorrow will take of itself.” It’s time for me to take time to focus on today and the gifts that this day has brought.

On her website, Ann Voskamp has a video that perfectly reflects where we need to be. It says “ How many moments of my life have my eyes been wide open, but I’ve been rushing, racing, sleeping right through? How many of the popsicle days and run & twirl & spins days; how many of the moments of melting ice cream, crazy laughter & dangling bare feet? Someone wake me up to the beating of wings & splashing of water, the setting of fog at twilight.  We have to figure out a way to stay fully awake. How do we awake to the moments and stop living like life is an emergency, something to speed wildly through? Life is not an emergency.  Life is our only dessert, too sweet, to delectable, to be hurried through. Pause between bites.  Gratitude of the seemingly small & insignificant, this is the seed that plants the giant miracle in the midst of it all.  Receive each moment for what it really is Holy, ordinary, amazing grace … a gift. “

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Tomorrow

Last week the unthinkable happened. A 14 year old boy shot at a MIDDLE school just a mile down the road from my house. Our neighborhood kids go to school there; my kids will go to school there. A 14 year old boy shot by another 14 year old boy in MADSION. Aren’t we protected here? Didn’t we choose Madison because of the safety and security she offers and the wonderful schools that are constantly receiving national awards? But yet it happened.    That night when I kissed my children and tucked them in I began sobbing. Sobbing at the sweet innocent faces as they slept. Uncontrollable sobbing knowing that there were two mothers who wouldn’t be kissing their babies and tucking them in that evening. And it happened in Madison, not Colorado or Florida or California, but here. The ugliness of this world had finally come too close to home.

The Bible tells us that we are not granted tomorrow, but still we take advantage of today because, we think, there will always be a tomorrow. “Not now dear, tomorrow…” “Mommy can’t play today, tomorrow…” “I will call my friend, tomorrow…” “Go see my grandparents, tomorrow…” But how many tomorrows never come. I have to admit I am very guilty of the tomorrows. Always planning what the kids and I might do tomorrow, because Mommy is working today. Taking that trip to see friends or grandparents tomorrow, because my schedule is so full today.   And tomorrow never comes. What would happen if we took just a few minutes every morning or at the end of the day to schedule in time for the tomorrows? What is one hour out of your day to play a game with the kids or to bake cookies? How much “work” would I really lose? So what if the house needs cleaning this weekend, it can wait, my friends my not.

If we take just a few minutes every day to schedule our time and follow a good Time Management plan, how many tomorrows could we fit in today? How many hours are lost in a day, because of poor time management? Hours we will never recover. Things that we may never get the chance to do! Precious time that is now lost; activities that now have to be put off until tomorrow.

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Goal Setting

There is always a lot of talk at the beginning of the year about setting new year\’s resolutions.  The most popular ones seem to resolve around personal improvement;  go to the gym, lose weight, eat healthy and stop smoking. I believe New Year\’s resolutions indicate that we still believe there is hope for improvement, that we can make a change.  However, there is the camp of people who believe that no one ever keeps their resolutions and therefore, why should you make them.  Well, they do have a point.  According to Marti Hope Gonzales, Aasociate professor of psychology at the University of Minnesota, research shows that “six weeks after people make their New Year\’s resolutions, 80 percent have either broken them or couldn\’t remember what they were.”. So why are we so bad at keeping our New Year\’s resolutions?  Several reasons actually; we don\’t write them down, they\’re not realistic, and we don\’t make a plan.

I love the beginning of the year and dreaming of all the wonderful things I want to achieve for the year, but I can\’t just daydream, I have to put it in writing.  Setting goals for your business life is a crucial part of growing.  My motto is “if you\’re not growing, you\’re dying”. Status Quo will not maintain your business, but kill it.  So now is the time to start putting your New Year\’s resolutions into action.   Schedule time on your calendar this week to plan.  Make sure you find a place and a time where you are totally uninterrupted.  Then dream of the things you want to accomplish.   Go ahead, dream!  Write them down even if they seem to be far out of reach.  If we don\’t begin with a dream, we can never accomplish the “impossible”.  So how are we going to accomplish our dreams? One step at a time.  Begin with the end in mind, then walk your self backwards making sure every step is realistic.  What do you need to accomplish quarterly, monthly, weekly and daily in order to achieve your goal? Once your goals are broken into smaller steps you will begin to see how achievable they really are.  You can do this!  You can choose today to accomplish what is on your task list without becoming overwhelmed about what you have to do this month or this year.  Take it one day at a time and you will be amazed at what you have achieved when you review your year at the end of 2012.

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Goal Setting 1

This year I received the movie Julie and Julia in my Christmas stocking. I was absolutely mesmerized as I watched it, maybe because I thoroughly enjoy cooking or, maybe it was seeing an average young women set out on a monumental task and achieve it. It reminded me of what we really can accomplish when we set goals and then work hard to accomplish them. I know so often in my own life I often find myself saying, “wouldn’t it be nice if…”
My oldest son and his wife gave me a wonderful French cookbook for Christmas. On our 6-hour ride home from their house, I read every recipe. Often I would read the recipe out loud to my husband and we would both comment on how good it sounded. I do this with every cookbook I get. I love to read them like novels. More often than not, many of those delicious recipes go unmade. So what happened to my good intentions?
According to a Dorthy.com survey, 66% of adults start the year off making New Years resolutions but only 17% will keep them. So why aren’t we keeping them. There are several reasons:
1)    Many of us make unrealistic goals. Setting goals that are unrealistic only ensures that we will become depressed and feel defeated. I love the idea of saying that I will cook my way through Julia Child’s cookbook in one year, but for me with my schedule and family, this is an impossible task so why would I torture myself. In the end, I will only feel defeated and be left with a sentiment that I can’t accomplish anything.
2)    We don’t set timelines for our goals. Our goals should state what we want to accomplish by a certain date. In the movie, Julie set her goal to cook her way through the entire Julia Child’s cookbook in one year, 524 recipes in 365 days.
3)    Break your goals down into small weekly or monthly goals. Once you begin with the end in mind, you can break your goal down into smaller more manageable bites. Julie’s goal was to cook her way through the entire cookbook in one year. There are 524 recipes in the cookbook and only 365 days in the year. This means Julie would have to cook 2 recipes a day nearly every day. It is important that Julie take into consideration that there might be some days she wouldn’t be able to cook at all. For Julie, it might be more feasible to say that she would cook 43 recipes a month. This way if she falls behind one or two days due to illness, etc., she knows what she must do to reach her monthly goal.
4)    Write them down and keep them in a place where you can see them. For Julie, there was a count down clock on her blog. She knew how many recipes she had to go and how many days left to finish. It is important for you to write your goals down with your timeline and keep them in a place where you can see them every day.
Without a clear plan it is hard for us to stay on track and accomplish our New Years resolutions or any goals for that matter. It’s like that GPS you received for Christmas. You have to put in your final destination and it will guide you there step by step. Turn left here, go 3 miles, turn right, continue on 14 miles, until you finally reach your destination. So go ahead and make those resolutions, but just make sure you develop a step by step plan to help you get there.
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Goal Setting

A few years ago, I received the movie Julie and Julia in my Christmas stocking. I was absolutely mesmerized as I watched it, maybe because I thoroughly enjoy cooking or, maybe it was seeing an average young women set out on a monumental task and achieve it. It reminded me of what we really can accomplish when we set goals and then work hard to accomplish them. I know so often in my own life I often find myself saying, “wouldn’t it be nice if…”
My oldest son and his wife gave me a wonderful French cookbook for Christmas. On our 6-hour ride home from their house, I read every recipe. Often I would read the recipe out loud to my husband and we would both comment on how good it sounded. I do this with every cookbook I get. I love to read them like novels. More often than not, many of those delicious recipes go unmade. So what happened to my good intentions?
According to a Dorthy.com survey, 66% of adults start the year off making New Years resolutions but only 17% will keep them. So why aren’t we keeping them. There are several reasons:
1)    Many of us make unrealistic goals. Setting goals that are unrealistic only ensures that we will become depressed and feel defeated. I love the idea of saying that I will cook my way through Julia Child’s cookbook in one year, but for me with my schedule and family, this is an impossible task so why would I torture myself. In the end, I will only feel defeated and be left with a sentiment that I can’t accomplish anything.
2)    We don’t set timelines for our goals. Our goals should state what we want to accomplish by a certain date. In the movie, Julie set her goal to cook her way through the entire Julia Child’s cookbook in one year, 524 recipes in 365 days.
3)    Break your goals down into small weekly or monthly goals. Once you begin with the end in mind, you can break your goal down into smaller more manageable bites. Julie’s goal was to cook her way through the entire cookbook in one year. There are 524 recipes in the cookbook and only 365 days in the year. This means Julie would have to cook 2 recipes a day nearly every day. It is important that Julie take into consideration that there might be some days she wouldn’t be able to cook at all. For Julie, it might be more feasible to say that she would cook 43 recipes a month. This way if she falls behind one or two days due to illness, etc., she knows what she must do to reach her monthly goal.
4)    Write them down and keep them in a place where you can see them. For Julie, there was a count down clock on her blog. She knew how many recipes she had to go and how many days left to finish. It is important for you to write your goals down with your timeline and keep them in a place where you can see them every day.
Without a clear plan it is hard for us to stay on track and accomplish our New Years resolutions or any goals for that matter. It’s like that GPS you received for Christmas. You have to put in your final destination and it will guide you there step by step. Turn left here, go 3 miles, turn right, continue on 14 miles, until you finally reach your destination. So go ahead and make those resolutions, but just make sure you develop a step by step plan to help you get there.
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