I often have clients who are in a quandary because they can’t figure out why they are unable to take themselves to the next level. They seem to have done really well getting to a certain point, but beyond that they feel stuck. This creates a gap in expectations that can limit your effectiveness and cause stress.
I often tell my clients, “What you don’t own, owns you.” I’m mainly referring to their emotions and communication style. We are all born with a certain personality style that makes us who we are, but “who we are” isn’t an excuse to ignore the thoughts, needs and feelings of those around us.
Have you often heard, or even worse, said, “That’s just how I am; they need to learn that and deal with it”? As leaders, it is important for us to take a step back and look at our personality style and emotional intelligence, and determine what adjustments we need to make in order for us to become more effective with those around us.
Abraham Maslow said, “What is necessary to change a person is to change his awareness of himself.” And how true that is! Your ability to grow is dependent on your ability to self-assess and become aware of those areas where you have these gaps.